Goals Update: 2020 Edition

Pandemic teaching, being overwhelmed, 2020. Before you know it, a quarter of a year has passed and you haven't posted on your blog. It was a weird year, and things didn't go as planned in many different areas. 2020 has not been a great year, but we all know that, but there are also some silver linings over the past year.  I got the chance to spend time with my family, get to see my kid in school, though through a tablet, and did some fun projects this year. So, while it's not as expected, and while the goals were a struggle, let's see how the goals went.

Goal Number One - Read 12 books: This year the goal is set at 12 books, but after we hit lockdown I really didn't read anything. It seems like I really should have been hitting the books hard with being stuck at home and nowhere to go then it would be the perfect time to get to do a bunch of reading, but it really didn't seem like something that I could do.  The stress I guess? Well, whatever the case may be, I only read four books this year. I enjoyed all of them, but I'm disappointed that I only got four. 

Reading List (total so far 4)

1. Dear America: Notes of an Undocumented Citizen by Jose Antonio Vargas
2. Falling Over Sideways by Jordan Sonnenblick
3. Fault Lines in the Constitution: The Framers, Their Fights, and the Flaws that Affect Us Today by Cynthia Levinson and  Sanford Levinson
4. A Beautifully Foolish Endeavor by Hank Green

Goal Number Two - Average a one pound per week weight loss by the end of the year: Big goose egg on this one. I'm basically in the same place that I started the year out in. I think I had the same issue here that I had with the reading, where I just couldn't stay focused on it.  I will say that some of my mini goals were ok:

• Subgoal 1: Close my three rings 75% of the time.  This I did perfectly, in fact, I've closed all three of my rings every day since February.  However, unfortunately, because of a phone that died and had to be rest, my log says that I've only done it since the reset. However, we know the truth, and that is that I hit this one out of the park, so SUCCESS!
• Subgoal 2: Create a schedule that includes two different activities a week.  I actually did really well on this one also. Most weeks I did at least two things, and they were usually yoga and then this kind of cross fit, interval training thing. I'm not sure what category it would go in, but it was one of those two.
• Subgoal 3: Log every meal, every day right after the meal.  I'm on day like 1,450 of this, so it was another really good success on this mini-goal.
• Subgoal 4: Complete another 5k race. With COVID this was not something that could happen. They had some virtual runs, but it's not the same.
• Subgoal 5: Limit my snacking to under 350 calories a day. I stopped tracking this, so this is the only one that I really didn't succeed at. So while I didn't reach my overall goal in health, I did do well on four out of five of these.

Goal Number Three - Use a social calendar:  What a year to pick to start using a calendar.  I bought a planner last year to keep track and better plan my social calendar and for the first few months, I was doing a really great job at it.  Then COVID hit, and it was basically a waste of cash because there was no real social calendar after that. I mean, we probably should have planned virtual meetings, but we didn't know how long it was going to last or what this all meant. So, I don't know, success for the time that I actually had to use that.

Goal Number Four - Home Repair/Improvements: We certainly had a bunch of home improvement work this year, thanks to the Covid.  We repainted just about every wall in the house. We repainted all of the trim, and it looks fantastic we also, of course, redid the second bathroom, and it looks great. We're actually still finishing a bit of that off.  Just yesterday I finished up some caulk work that makes the entire thing look a lot more finished.  We also recently replaced the exhaust fan for that bathroom, which (SURPRISE) didn't actually vent to the outside because the builders sucked.  But, yes, we did really well here, and I really enjoyed doing some of the work. I built some furniture, and it was really good, so success here.

Goal Number Five - Spend at least one hour a week on creative things: I didn't really do this at all. I did some drawing over the year, but I didn't focus on it at all. So, fail.

Goal Number Six - Take three photos a day:  So, I started a daily Instagram to do this, and I did a number of posts to it, but then it was tough with the pandemic to find something new to take a photo of. So, with 366 days this year, I should have taken 1,098 photos, but I didn't, and instead ended the year with 867, so I missed it by 231.  My goal was to have 3 photos a day, and I averaged 2.36.  That's not really that bad.

Goal Number Seven - Have seven new experiences:  So, I certainly experienced some new things this year. It really wasn't what I expected. I think I hit seven this year, despite the weirdness of 2020.  So, here are the new things I did this year:

1.  Visited the natural history museum at the University of Michigan
2.  Living in a pandemic with a stay at home order
3.  Taught school over the Internet
4.  Ordered groceries for at-home delivery because we can't go anywhere
5.  Began emergency planning since it's hard to get food and supplies now
6. Ordered from the Peach Truck and made three new recipes, two cobblers, and a bread pudding
7. Built furniture, and it turned out really well!

Well, 2020 was certainly not what I expected, and my goals didn't turn out as I had hoped they would. However, tomorrow is the start of 2021, so new goals and hopefully a new focus.  Happy new year, and thank goodness 2020 is in our rearview. May 2021 be a better year.

Goals Update: August Edition

Well, we're in the second half of the year, not that time really matters because it's the same every day, we don't go anywhere, and can't do anything.

Goal Number One - Read 12 books: This year the goal is set at 12 books, with an extended goal of 18 books.  I finished two more books this month, which means I'm up to four out of my twelve goal. I don't devote enough time to reading. I just feel so tired and I just don't want to read.

Reading List (total so far 2)

1. Dear America: Notes of an Undocumented Citizen by Jose Antonio Vargas
2. Falling Over Sideways by Jordan Sonnenblick
3. Fault Lines in the Constitution: The Framers, Their Fights, and the Flaws that Affect Us Today by Cynthia Levinson and  Sanford Levinson
4. A Beautifully Foolish Endeavor by Hank Green

Goal Number Two - Average a one pound per week weight loss by the end of the year: I've not had some fluctuations, and right now I'm trending downward, so hopefully things will turn out well. I do have the obstacle that my treadmill is currently out of commission. I think it needs a new belt. But here's what I got on the mini-goals:

• Subgoal 1: Close my three rings 75% of the time.  Since February I have had straight perfect months. There were a few days this month that I thought I wouldn't make it, but I pulled it out in the end!
• Subgoal 2: Create a schedule that includes two different activities a week.  Becky has joined me on this one and we've got a pretty good schedule going, so well done here.
• Subgoal 3: Log every meal, every day right after the meal.  Don't skip any snacks.  Still doing fine on this.
• Subgoal 4: Complete another 5k race. With COVID I'm going to throw this goal out. I don't see anything happening before the end of the year or me feeling comfortable about doing a run.
• Subgoal 5: Limit my snacking to under 350 calories a day. I've been snacking more with fruit lately, though I am out of fruit currently. I still need to focus here though.

Goal Number Three - Use a social calendar:  Well, COVID really kind of made this a laughable goal since the social calendar has been closed since March.  We haven't had any family dinners since the middle of March, we've had no gatherings, and aside from a couple of outside bonfires, there has been no contact with anyone. 

Goal Number Four - Home Repair/Improvements:  July had a lot of movement here. We pulled out the floor in the bathroom and put tile down. We also replaced the tub, but need to get new tile for around the tub, and get the vanity finished up. We also had major painting going on in our bedroom, the hall, and the foyer, as well as all the trim upstairs, down the stairs, and in the foyer.  In terms of hours left on the bathroom project, it's not much left. The tiling doesn't usually take long, though you have to wait periods before grouting etc. Our next step is to replace the carpet, perhaps a bit more painting in the main floor. Then since it'll be moving toward cooler days, perhaps some outdoor jobs replacing some wood trim, painting, etc.  We're also looking at replacing our foyer light, so that's very exciting. It's been a very busy month for home improvements.

Goal Number Five - Spend at least one hour a week on creative things: Haven't done much on this one, unless painting a wall counts, haha!

Goal Number Six - Take three photos a day:  So, I started a daily Instagram to do this, and it's got 523 posts so far, though that's 116 below where it should be, so basically I'm about a month behind. I've done some fun cooking series, and some on improvements, so perhaps I can catch up doing a few more like that. It's hard to find new things to photograph when all we do is stay home.

Goal Number Seven - Have seven new experiences:  Given the state of things, I don't know that this is going to really end up hitting the goal number, and if it does it's certainly not going to be for experiences that I was really going for. Though, I did order fresh peaches from The Peach Truck, so that should be something fun and new.

1.  Visited the natural history museum at the University of Michigan
2.  Living in a pandemic with a stay at home order
3.  Taught school over the Internet
4.  Ordered groceries for at home deliver because we can't go anywhere
5.  Began emergency planning since it's hard to get food and supplies now
6. Ordered from the Peach Truck and made three new recipes, two cobblers, and a bread pudding

So, that's it for the August update.

Rabbit Hole of a Big Fat Rabbit

July is the month of rabbit holes. Or perhaps it's better to call this project creep. Well perhaps not. Perhaps it's more of a planned rabbit hole. You see, back in March when this whole COVID nonsense started, we got some supplies before the lockdown so that we could do some cosmetic renovation to Jasmine's old room so that we could move Sal into it. It wasn't anything major, just paint and some boards to create the board and batten look in her new room. When we talked about moving her to a new room she insisted that the room had to look the same and since it's just paint and a few boards, it seemed like that could easily be arranged. Well, we finished it up and it looks pretty good, however, the carpet is not in great shape. It's the same carpet that we got about 11 years ago, and when we put it in we had to do the entire house so we got the cheapest possible carpet because at the time Becky had just started student teaching so she had no job, and I was about to start my student teaching. So the cost was a major concern, and as they say, "You get what you pay for." I don't think this carpet was designed to last for as long as it did. I mean, even the guest room looks horrible, and for the most part no one has really ever lived in there. Sean stayed in the room for a few months over a couple of years during school breaks, and we've had guests, but overall, I'd say that of the 11 years there has been less than one year of occupancy in that room. Theoretically, having only about a year's worth of wear and tear means that it should be in far better condition than it is. With that in mind, before Sal moves in I think we need to recarpet. We could move her in first, but we plan to consolidate her bedroom and playroom, and it seems to make more sense to carpet the room before there's so much shit to move. At the same time, the entire upstairs needs to be recarpeted as well. So, I figured if they're going to come for one, they might as well do the entire upstairs. But, if they're going to do the entire upstairs, then we probably should retile the bathroom floor, since the threshold will require some of the carpet getting pulled up, and it'd make more sense to do that before we get new carpet so that when they put the new carpet in it will be nice and finished instead of having to rip it up and trying to make it look good. So, we tore up the linoleum in that bathroom and put down some lovely tile. However, since we were putting in new tile, it made sense to pull out the vanity to tile the room, and it's a shitty ugly vanity with new drawers, so it made more sense to replace the vanity at the same time. However, because we were replacing the vanity with a lovely white vanity, the almond colored tub and toilet was really ugly. So, we pulled out the toilet (which we had to do anyway to tile) and decided to buy a new one, and we pulled out the tub surround (which was broken anyway) at the same time. The new tub was a real a-hole to get into the space, but eventually, we managed to get it in there. We haven't yet decided on a tile to put around the tub area, so the bathroom is partially done and there isn't a ton of work left to do before it's finished, just the wall tile and vanity which is a couple of days due to the need to wait between tile and grout etc. However, the bedroom door needed to be repainted, and the bathroom door needed to be replaced. Which then meant that the trim also needed to be repainted. Since that requires some precision painting, it seemed like we needed to paint the trim along the carpet before we get new carpet. So, I painted all the trim along the upstairs and then down the stairs. However, that required some repair on the wall, and so we had to do some touch up along the wall. Well, the paint doesn't quite match due to fading, so that means we might as well do the painting before we get new carpet so there's not accidental drips or spills. So now we have tested colors on teh hall wall, and picked a new color for the bedroom that is halfway finished in the bedroom. So, that's been what's been going on the past few weeks. One thing is leading to another and then another. It's starting to look really nice around the house, and I'm really loving the new colors we picked. They aren't terribly different from what we had before, just changes in tone and it just looks so much nicer than before. As it stands right now I have to finish the pain in our bedroom, finish the floor trim in the bedroom, paint the hall and foyer, paint the guest room, then get new carpet. We're moving right along, and it's probably the first major changes we've done to the house since we bought it. I guess this is what happens after 18 weeks of being stuck at home and not being able to go anywhere combines with no vacations for the foreseeable future.

Down Another Rabbit Hole

Today I went down another rabbit hole, however, this one was a cleaning to home improvement sort. Today I was going about my regular cleaning plan, and that called for a cleaning of the house bathrooms. This is a regularly scheduled cleaning to help keep me organized and ensure all the house stays clean. I even have a reminder that pops up on bathroom cleaning days. This one was a little more needed because the last scheduled one was missed because we were doing home improvement work so everything really needed a good scrub. When I got to our bathroom, that is when things went downhill. I was doing my regular scrub of the bathtub/shower and I was trying to get some crud up from along the track of the shower door, it seemed like it was coming from under it, so I used a scraper to try and get under it since it's nice and thin. Well, as I did that an even larger amount of even grosser stuff was being pulled out. so I tried to use some water to wash it out, which seemed to make the entire situation even worse. That meant the only logical thing to do, because there was no way that I could just leave it under there now that I knew it was under there, was to take the doors off completely and do a thorough cleaning. This led to a prolonged effort to remove the silicone caulk that was along the sides of the door frame so that I could get the doors off. This then led to further time to get the dub where the frame had been completely clean because it was a mess. I then had to get the doors more thoroughly cleaned because there was no way that I could put the doors back on while they were dirty. After a couple hours, I managed to get everything cleaned to my preference and so I then reattached the doors and the tub/shower was good to go. Now, this sounds like quite the undertaking, however I planned to do this eventually, I just didn't know it would be today. A while back I was annoyed that the moldy caulk around the corner of the door frames was so disgusting and couldn't be cleaned. I bought some new silicone to fix it, but hadn't set a date to do so. As it turns out, the reason that I couldn't clean it was that the mold was growing on the bottom of the caulk not on top of it. As it turns out, there was no caulk around the bottom of the frame, so water was seeping in under the frame allowing all that gross shit to sit and do what gross shit does. It's so much nicer now that it's all clean and there isn't gross moldy caulk running around in the corners. It's like a new shower! Or at least it will keep me happy for a while until we redo the shower in that bathroom.

Down A Rabbit Hole

Last night I had a kind of strange dream where we moved to a house across the street from one of my childhood friends.  I spent many days playing over at the friend's house, having sleepovers, getting lost in the wooded area behind the house, though when I look back he probably was not really that great a friend and was somewhat overbearing. So, in this dream, we're living across the street, but it's modern-day so they don't live there anymore. I'm not sure why my brain decided this was a time to focus on that. I wasn't thinking about it recently, in fact, I haven't thought about it much at all since we moved away nearly thirty years ago. But, for whatever reason, my brain dug that one up and decided that I was going to dream about it and that we lived across the street.

Well, when I got up this morning I had this fresh in my mind and so decided that I'd pull up the good old Google Maps and then explore a little. I also decided to take a look at the Zillow listings for the house and the neighboring houses. In this case, the house had been sold in the past 10 years or so, and because of that, there were plenty of photos of the interior. It looked exactly how I remembered it other than having no furniture in the house.  Even down to the terribly dated carpet in the basement (which was dated thirty years ago the last time I was there. For the most part, the entire house was exactly the same, though there were a few minor changes in the bathroom. I remember, living in a trailer, thinking that this was a large and pretty nice house. In the pictures, it still mainly held true, though the pricing listing was much lower than I would expect for a house of that size. It's larger than our current home, but the value is perhaps half what ours is. I suppose much of that has to do with the fact that it's in a town that doesn't have too much going for it.

A few. years ago the town voted to have their school district basically disbanded except for one elementary school. All the students in middle and high school would be bussed one town over.  When we lived there the town had four different elementary schools a middle school, and a high school. Though, it seems according to the census that there has been a drop of around 25% in the population since the 1990 census which was shortly before we moved away. I can still remember my bus route, though that makes sense because I did it every day from K-5. It seems weird that the town has multiple school buildings, large stately midcentury looking schools, that sit empty because there aren't enough kids to fill them anymore.  I remember going to kindergarten round up to a school that I didn't end up going to because I got into a different school that was smaller and kind of like a charter but not like charters today. The school I didn't end up going to was a bus transfer school. I'd go from my school to that school then trade busses. The school had a strong smell that I always thought smelled like walnuts.  I don't recall them really discussing what I was supposed to do, or maybe they did but I was in kindergarten so I didn't know and was scared the first time and was crying and they asked me where I lived but I didn't really know but they asked who my parents were and for some reason thought when I said first and last names that it was funny.  My bus driver was sweeping the aisle the first time I saw her and they said she was my bus driver and made some kind of joke about her and a broom. I assume it was a joke about her being a witch. She was pretty nice, and on the last day of school stopped at the local ice cream place and bought the entire bus a treat. I always got a slush.

The dream took me down a weird rabbit hole today looking up all this stuff. Before I knew it the day was basically over and I'd spent it all on Google Maps and Zillow.

There Are 2 Cats In America... or Our House

It's been a while since I posted, and since then we have had a few changes in the house, one of them being we now have two kittens.  Well, they're looking less like kittens now since we've had them three months, but you get the idea.  They are two brothers that we call The Minsters because they are called Rufus and Kingsley after two of the Ministers for Magic. It's been fun to have young active cats in the house again because they're so full of energy and activity. The last time we had kittens was back when we first got Fluffy and Norbert in 2001.  They are constantly getting into trouble, though nothing too bad, and causing mischief. They've both quickly discovered that the spray bottle is their enemy and all I have to do is pick it up for them to change what they are doing. For example, last night Rufus was perched on the back of one of the kitchen chairs clearly determining how best to jump to the kitchen island and so I picked up the spray bottle in order to be ready to get him if he did it. He looked over at me and immediately scrambled down to the floor and ran off.

Lately, I have been pretty anti-pet. They were generally getting old and so over time the numbers of pets would slowly come to zero. We've had old and sick pets so long, and the end of life really bothers me. Norbert and Simon really took a lot out of me, so I just felt that it'd be better to not have any pets anymore. However, when we lost Errol Sal was sad and wanted kittens. She's been wanting kittens for a long time, and we said we didn't want to get any while Errol was still around because he was old and grumpy and we didn't want to bother him with a crazy kitten. When we got to spring and kittens seemed off the table because of COVID she got really sad one day and started crying because she was never going to get a kitten because the "Coronavirus is ruining everything!" Well, Becky happened to find a rescue that had a litter of kittens and we were able to pick them up, in what sounded like some sort of hostage exchange where no one got close in a parking lot.

When we brought them home they were tiny little guys who were very afraid of everything in the house. They spent most of the first day hiding under Sal's play table, which was very frustrating for Sal because she just wanted to cuddle them and play but they were not about that at all. For the first week or so we kept them contained in Sal's new room so that they would get used to us, and we'd go in regularly to pet and play with them.  After that we put up a baby gate so that they could see and sniff the dogs but still get away from them if they didn't want to see them.  We were actually a little concerned because Ronan seemed a little aggressive toward them, which made me really nervous to have them interact. However, once they started climbing the baby gate and getting out we figured it was time to adjust it and so we lifted the gate so they could come out but get back in and the dogs couldn't get to them at all.  After that it was fine and they've been getting along well.  In fact, they've enjoyed cuddling with Ronan, who at times looks very confused as to why they are there and uncomfortable with it but he doesn't move he just looks stressed out.  Luna is pretty much best friends with Rufus, but even Kingsley will purr and rub against her.  She loves it.

So, the house is full of cat scampers and crazy cats speeding all over the place. It's pretty fun.

A Very Un-Merry 4th

Today I had to run over to take care of something in the garden yesterday and it hit me that today was going to be the 4th of July.  I love the 4th of July, which isn't really surprising as someone who is big into history. I have fond memories of 4th of July parades, cookouts, buying fireworks at Meijer, and setting them off at my Grandma's.  She used to get us a wood board to do snakes on because they would stain the sidewalk if you just did it on them without the wood. I remember one year we did a bunch of fountains on top of one of her picnic tables in the back yard near the hickory tree.  After the fountains we played with sparklers and of course did the thing where you move them quickly and spell out your names. We also often went to see firework displays, often at Gyro Park (now Ford Lake Park). One year I remember driving back to my Gran's house in her minivan and one of us turned on one of the dome lights and she told us to shut that off because "someone will shoot you!" She was a little paranoid. In recent years we've spent many holidays elsewhere.  We've gone to see the D.C. firworks, we've been in Maine, or Pittsburg on larger trips.

So generally, the 4th of July is often a fun time.  This year, though, has not been fun.  With the virus still raging, we didn't have a cookout. We didn't go to see any fireworks. We couldn't even watch the traditional Capitol 4th because they couldn't really do it. They tried to do a concert where people got streamed in, but it wasn't the same.  It even seemed like the neighborhood fireworks weren't as big as usual. We heard them going off for a couple hours, but there weren't as many as there have been in the past. It wasn't fun.

This is kind of the big summer holiday, and we had to miss it.  I mean, sure we could do something later in the year, but the way things are going now, I don't see that as happening. I'm kind of already looking at the rest of the year as a wash. I don't know that we'll be doing any more social events in 2020, which is disappointing, even for someone who generally doesn't mind staying home.  Add to that the absurd political state of the world, and it's hard to feel patriotic and excited to celebrate the holiday when we have such a terrible country right now. It's just a big reminder of how things aren't normal, and how things probably won't be normal for quite some time.

Hamilton

It's Hamilton Day!  I actually forgot that this was coming out so soon, and about a week ago I saw the trailer and got super excited that it was only a week until we'd be able to watch it.  I remember the first time I heard about the show, we were actually walking in New York and Becky mentioned something about a show about Alexander Hamilton and that it uses pop, rap, and R&B style music, and I said to her, "That sounds like a terrible show." We actually could have gotten tickets because it was still in previews or workshop, or whatever it was because it wasn't on Broadway yet. Fast forward a few years when I start hearing more about it and some of the hype around it so I figured maybe I should give it a listen and see what it was all about and instantly regretted my previous error and quickly listened to the entire album on the way to and from work.

Well, today was finally the day to see the original cast on stage and not a shitty YouTube bootleg. So, we told Sal that she could stay up late to watch the show, which she also was excited about (though she only made it through Act I before asking to go to bed).  We ordered some dinner and sat down to watch the show.  Of course, it was amazing.  We got to see the show in Chicago, which was good, but it's nothing to the original cast and the Broadway-level of things.  You can set up other shows, do tours, but there's something different about a Broadway show that puts it over the top in a way that you don't get other places. Perhaps it's the budget, perhaps it's the environment, but whatever the case is, this blew the version we saw out of the water. It was fantastic!

I've listened to the album dozens of times, and know the show well, however seeing it really shifted some things. I never picked up how antagonistic Hamilton was toward Burr in the recording that is so clear in the live performance. The way things were said was a little different and the facial expressions were so much more confrontational. Likewise, the acting made some scenes harder, that you don't' get just from voices. Philips's duel and death was so much harder than the recording because the pain of his parents losing him is so much harder than just listening to it on cd.

It was such a great performance, and I already want to watch it again.

Change Averse

The world is always changing, especially in the tech world. It's pretty familiar that every so often some tech platform rolls out a new look with a different interface that we all have to figure out. I recently saw someone post on Facebook that they hate the new interface, which seems like the reaction every time they do a new interface.  As I am writing now, I'm using a new Blogger interface, which is about the same but everything just looks slightly different. Is Blogger struggling and so they want to give it a fresh look to try and invigorate it? Make it more like some of the other blog posting sites? I feel like since Google has taken over Blogger, they generally ignored it, like colonial salutary neglect. I prefer it that way, to be honest, leave it alone and don't try to Google-fy it.

Have I ever mentioned I hate g-mail? I can't stand the interface. It's messy and annoying and I hate everything about it. Way back when people dropped their old internet 1.0 addresses and replaced it with a Google address I didn't really bother because I hated it so much. They haven't changed it. It's still just as awful as it has always been. If it's going to be awful, then I might as well just stick with the awful old e-mail that I've had since the 1900s. People make fun of me for having an old e-mail address, but it's not really accurate. I have many e-mail addresses, in fact, I think I have about seven different accounts, which is all stupid and more than necessary, especially since e-mail has just become the same thing as snail mail where all you get is junk. Sometimes I'll make little alterations to my name when I sign up for things to see who sells my information. 

I'm a slow change person. I don't insist that everything stays the way it's always been. I'm fine if things change if they make sense and make things better. I don't like change just for the sake of change. I don't like the kind of change that's about the "fashion" of the interface. Like, this season's biggest trend is curved button edged! And then a year later they get rid of that and square everything off. It's stupid and the only reason they do it is that some people in a room think it's necessary. On the other hand some things go with the same look for a long time. I feel like say Coca-Cola might be an example as they've basically the same logo, color, and look for ages.  Not that I really care about that, though I will say Cheetos got me when they recently released a bunch of retro bags and I was like, "Well of course I'm going to buy those, it's like the 1900s again!" They didn't taste any better, but they felt better because it had extra nostalgia sprinkled on.

I guess the thing is, you have to make a change be an improvement in order to make it worth it. How does this change make my experience better? If it's just a look that I suddenly have to try and figure out where everything is again then you're not making my life better. If you're improving functionality then I'll support your changes. Overall, that doesn't seem to be the case, and so I don't enjoy changed. I don't like when a product I use and like is changed or discontinued because then I have to find something else that ultimately I don't like better because if I had I would have been using it all along. That makes me grumpy, much like most other changes that aren't an improvement. Life is constant change, but that doesn't mean it can't be a disappointment.

Goals Update: July Edition

Despite being at home since March, and theoretically having more time available because for example, I now no longer spend an hour a day in my car going to and from work, I have not updated since April. Quarantine life is weird. Though, to be fair it's not really a quarantine, as the word was derived from Latin and was about isolating for 40 days. We're past 40 days, and I feel like another lockdown is coming.  But, forget all that for right now because it's time for a goals update!

Goal Number One - Read 12 books: This year the goal is set at 12 books, with an extended goal of 18 books.  For January I finished two books up, which was a pretty good start to things but then I couldn't really get into reading, so I haven't done much since. I have two books in progress that I could finish soon, so hopefully next month I'll have some progress to report.

Reading List (total so far 2)

1. Dear America: Notes of an Undocumented Citizen by Jose Antonio Vargas
2. Falling Over Sideways by Jordan Sonnenblick

Goal Number Two - Average a one pound per week weight loss by the end of the year: I've not had some fluctuations, and right now I'm trending downward, so hopefully things will turn out well. I do have the obstacle that my treadmill is currently out of commission. I think it needs a new belt. But here's what I got on the mini-goals:

• Subgoal 1: Close my three rings 75% of the time.  Since February I have had straight perfect months. I believe I'm at like a 157-day streak of hitting 100% on all three rings. I'd say I should up it, but the goal is already pretty high, and I don't go much beyond the goal most days.
• Subgoal 2: Create a schedule that includes two different activities a week.  For most weeks I've had two different activities per week, but the past month or so and certainly since the treadmill broke it's not been going well.
• Subgoal 3: Log every meal, every day right after the meal.  Don't skip any snacks.  Still doing fine on this.
• Subgoal 4: Complete another 5k race. With COVID I'm going to throw this goal out. I don't see anything happening before the end of the year or me feeling comfortable about doing a run.
• Subgoal 5: Limit my snacking to under 350 calories a day.  I don't really pay much attention to this, and I should. I know the past few weeks where I've been working on house projects has meant a lot less snacking so that's been helpful

Goal Number Three - Use a social calendar:  Well, COVID really kind of made this a laughable goal since the social calendar has been closed since March.  We haven't had any family dinners since the middle of March, we've had no gatherings, and aside from a couple of outside bonfires, there has been no contact with anyone.  I feel I may have wasted cash on that planner that I bought.

Goal Number Four - Home Repair/Improvements:  Well, we've been working on this one hard since we have nothing else to do. We're moving Sal's room and so she wanted it to look just like her old room. We've just about finished it, we just need to replace the ceiling fan. I think the most tedious was getting the window sils painted. I had them pretty nice and then one of our new kittens jumped up on them when they weren't quite dry and left cat prints all over the carpet. We also began a reno of Sal's bathroom. We pulled out the vanity, linoleum, and tub/shower surround. As I type I have to fix one tile that didn't get pushed down and attached, then grout. We then have to add walls around the shower and then tile. It's already looking much nicer than it was.

Goal Number Five - Spend at least one hour a week on creative things: I mean, unless you count podcasting as creative, then I'm not really doing this. Though I did a great drawing of Bluey and Bingo the other day for Sal, so that was fun.

Goal Number Six - Take three photos a day:  So, I started a daily Instagram to do this, and it's got 434 posts so far, though that's 100 below where it should be, so basically I'm about a month behind. There hasn't been much to photograph, and there are no vacations coming. I doubt I'll hit my three per day total by the end of the year, but it's been fun anyway.

Goal Number Seven - Have seven new experiences:  Given the state of things, I don't know that this is going to really end up hitting the goal number, and if it does it's certainly not going to be for experiences that I was really going for. Though, I did order fresh peaches from The Peach Truck, so that should be something fun and new.

1.  Visited the natural history museum at the University of Michigan
2.  Living in a pandemic with a stay at home order
3.  Taught school over the Internet
4.  Ordered groceries for at home deliver because we can't go anywhere
5.  Began emergency planning since it's hard to get food and supplies now

The first half of the year is over. I'd say it couldn't get worse, but perhaps I'll get to experience the fall of our Republic since the dipshit in chief is already laying the groundwork for the "rigged" election in November. 2020 can suck it.

Stupid Is As Stupid Does

You hear a lot from Republicans and conservatives that they don't like being called stupid and racist.  They don't like being talked down to, or to be accused of being ignorant. They. Hate. It.  Yet, then they turn around and do something stupid while waving something racist.  Today a bunch of Trump fans decided that they needed to plan a protest of Governor Whitmer's latest executive which says that stores like Lowes have to shut off areas of the store that aren't essential like the paint or garden sections, that lawn care crews can't be called essential workers, and that people can't go to their second homes. Some guys are suing because their 1st and 4th amendment rights have been infringed upon.  But today, what they decided to do was to flood the capitol in a big ol' parade of stupid to show how unhappy they are with this.  They blocked up roads, on and off-ramps, and entrances including to hospitals.  They waved the Confederate battle flag. They crowded together to "own the libs" and their social distancing guidelines.

Stupid is as stupid does.

I get it, no one likes to be called stupid. But, if you keep doing stupid things over and over again you are going to be called stupid over and over again.  However, this is what happens when one party in this country has spent the past forty years tearing down the government, attacking expertise, denying science, vilifying colleges and education.  Seeing crowds of people out doing the exact thing that will spread this thing, make people sick, and lead to death is the product of decades of conservative politics.  This is why a large segment of the population, most at risk because they lack healthcare, sick pay, and economic stability, are arguing that this thing is overblown and fake news.  They sit and watch all this happening, and somehow are now arguing that the possibility of 100,000 deaths is not a big deal.  They see this thing being bungled day after day, lie after lie, but are being fed a constant stream of bullshit and are still sticking with Trump when his failures are so obvious that there is a website ticking up the death rate every day.

If a group of people you know were telling you something, and one single friend told you something else and said that literally everyone else you know is lying to you and you can only trust that one person, you'd probably think that one person was the one you couldn't trust.  That's why those commercials say 4 out of 5 doctors recommend this toothpaste.  Yet, in Fox News world, if Fox was that one doctor they'd say it's fake news and brush their teeth with sugar-coated horseshit and pretend it tasted like mint.  Yet, they don't want to be called stupid. Time after time they do stupid ass shit, then get mad when tells them they're doing stupid ass shit. They get defensive and say, "well it's just my opinion." as if that means fucking anything.  Your opinion doesn't matter. Opinions are built off of facts and evidence.  When new evidence is discovered, your opinions should change.  This lot instead says it's fake news, and the evidence doesn't count because they want to cling to their opinions rather than shift them to something that is different from what they've been spoon-fed.

Sure, there is a point when measures like this could be authoritarian, but when they are temporary to combat a deadly pandemic, this isn't the time to cry about your 4th amendment rights which really seems like a stretch anyway.  If it were permanent, of it it was not a legitimate use of power then sure, a protest would be logical.  However, when it's something that has infected over a half million people and still growing, now is not the time. The thing is, by doing this they may have made this shit longer for all of us because I'm willing to bet we're going to see a spike because these human-truck-nuts went out and did the one thing we need to not do right now. 

For 244 years our country has asked Americans to sacrifice for the greater good, and at times that greater good was a load of horse shit (I'm looking at you Vietnam, Iraq II, Korea, etc.). We've been asked to ration, to send our kids to war, to help our neighbors, to donate to first responders, to pay our taxes on time to keep the arsenal of democracy going.  We've been asked to stay home.  This is not a sacrifice that is hard. Oh no. You can't buy gardening equipment and have your lawn crew out. Boo hoo!  This is not much of a sacrifice, so maybe all these little bitches should shut the fuck up. For some, they don't have jobs they can do from home, and I understand that this is hard for them.  But that's not who was out there on the roads showing their asses.  Those people are sacrificing.  They are trying to get through to unemployment offices.  They're trying to make their money go further because they are doing jobs that are basically expendable while the rich CEOs say that a living wage is too much to ask and healthcare isn't their responsibility. 

These MAGA shits are not working in good faith, and when this is all over there needs to be a reckoning where we deal with the absurd systems that are failing us right now. This pandemic has laid bare the inadequacies in healthcare, especially when linked to employment.  It has shown that the people who are paid the least are the most essential. It has illustrated what "making government small enough to drown in a teaspoon" really does when there is not proper funding of the CDC or WHO. It shows that the scariest thing isn't the words, "I'm from the government and I'm here to help," but that it's "I don't take responsibility at all."

This isn't the wild west, and "Governments are instituted among Men... to effect their Safety and Happiness."  Safety and happiness are necessary to allow us to pursue happiness and provide us with life and liberty.  "We the People of the United States, in Order to... promote the general Welfare," established a government.  This is what it was for, and when we've spent nearly half a century attacking it, destroying it, and acting stupid this is what you end up with.

So, if you want people to stop calling you stupid, then I guess you need to stop being fucking stupid.

On Being Together

This is the end of the fourth week of staying at home, so I've been home for 29 days without having to go to work.  I do have to teach online and spend a lot of time doing that as well as home projects.  However, I would say that my biggest job the past nearly-30-days has been keeping Sal busy.  Or perhaps that has been her biggest job for me because she does not want me to be doing anything else except playing games, pretending, or interacting with her.  I prefer the actual games, the art, or things like that over the pretend play.  She's very bossy with the pretend play and is constantly telling me what I should be doing.  That's not how improv works!  You have to go with it not say, "No, daddy pretend that you do the exact opposite of what you just said."  It's nice to get to play and spends so much time with her, even though it can be exhausting to try and keep up with her demands of playing and the constant games that I don't find all that fun for me.

She's also been one to constantly ask questions.  All the time. Over and over again. Sometimes the same questions over and over again.  For the first two weeks of the quarantine she asked me usually at least once a day, but sometimes more, if I "liked our time together?" Every day I would say absolutely loved our time together, and she'd say, "me too!" After about a week of this, I pointed out that she asked me this every day and that of course I did.  She eventually stopped asking that and moved on to other questions.  Yesterday she asked me, "Daddy, what is your 5th favorite color?"  and "What is your second favorite holiday?"  She doesn't seem satisfied that I don't have a 5th favorite color or a 4th favorite day.  The other day when I got out of the shower I put on my NASA shirt, and when she came in and saw I was wearing it she excitedly explained, "I CAN WEAR MY NASA SHIRT TODAY TOO!" She then promptly when and found hers to wear.  That day she asked me things like, "What is a meteor shower?" and after I explained it she asked, "Why do those happen?"  I love that she is inquisitive and curious about things. It's actually one of the things that I worry about her going to school because she wants to know things but I think our education system is killing natural curiosity and a desire to learn things by forcing us to focus so much on standardized tests which eliminate things that make school and learning fun. I do feel better about it now because it looks like we were able to get her into a program that will hopefully help preserve that curious nature and allow her to kind of direct her own learning.  But I'm going to move on before I evolve into a rant on the education system, and instead, I'll save that for a later date.

I also love to have so much time with Sal because when we work all day she wants to pack in constantly playing when we are home together and so we don't usually get very much in the way of downtime.  Since we're home together all day we have a more relaxed time that I've really enjoyed. The other day I introduced her to Sailor Moon.  This was for two reasons, the first was she was watching this modern show where they have these kids who can transform into superheroes and it was just the worst.  I figured if she liked that then she's probably like Sailor Moon, which is better (though also horrible, but at least it's something horrible that I have a soft spot for because there is nostalgia linked to it because it was my first anime).  Turns out, she loves Sailor Moon and we've been watching a couple episodes after dinner every night.  The other night she was sitting on the couch after dinner eating her "dessert" popsicle.  I was standing eating one too and she said, "Daddy, can you just stand there while I eat my popsicle.  She just wanted me to be nearby, something that I've noticed lately because she comes up for random hugs, and likes being near her while she eats lunch or dinner.  So instead I decided to sit down on the couch with her so we could watch Sailor Moon and eat our popsicles together.  I finished mine well before hers and as we sat I put my hand on her shoulder for a minute, but when I took my hand away she said, "Daddy, can you put your hand on my shoulder again?"  She just wants cuddles, and it was really sweet. 

I've often joked that this kind of life being stuck home has been the best because I hate people and having to leave the house.  Since we can't go I don't have any pressure to ever leave.  This is partially a joke, I do love going to some places, doing some things, going shopping, getting dinner, seeing family and friends.  However, I also love staying home and this has not put much of any stress on me at all.  In fact, I feel far less stressed and anxious than usual. I love this time together with my family, though I wish it could be with the whole family since we're all off work and could be having fun together and enjoying our time.  But, as long as I can get some cuddles, Sailor Moon, and popsicles on a lazy after dinner evening, I'll take the pretend play and questions about what my 18th favorite smell is.

I Can Do It!

Having a bit more free time than in the past I've found myself going down some strange YouTube rabbit holes. Last Saturday I came across a channel that does videos of races, but instead of cars, they use marbles.  I became far too invested in this where I've got some favorite marbles and some that I don't like at all.  They do qualifiers that set the race order, then they reset the course every race because they are going "around the world" to different tracks.  This guy has multiple cameras, has "rain" tunnels, and it's like a live commentator while it's going on. I'm most impressed by the timing that they do for each lap for each marble.  It's crazy. 

I also went down this hole of home improvement looking at things like building furniture like tables, side tables, storage cabinets, etc.  Also, I watched a bunch of videos on deck building.  I think I've probably watched about 20 hours of videos on these topics over the past two weeks and feel like I probably could do some of this stuff.  I mean, part of this is because I've gotten quotes for building a deck that works out to $15,000 for a literal square deck that isn't that big.  Nothing special, no bells and whistles, but a basic square deck. They gave me material lists and when I plug it into Home Depot with COMPOSITE decking I could buy the materials for between $2,000-$2,500 so that other $13,000ish is just highway robbery.  I can fucking screw some wood (dirty) to the side of my house and lay some decking.  The only thing that really worries me is the holes and supports, which I feel is probably just more of my general worry/anxiety than my abilities.  It's pretty clear what you're supposed to do and as long as you're doing it correctly you should be good to go.  I'm also a little worried about making sure everything is waterproofed so I don't have rainwater seeping in and rotting the house.  However, it doesn't seem like it's worth $15,000, and that I should be able to do it myself since there aren't really any reasonable quotes.  We did have one group that said they could do it for a reasonable amount, but it didn't include the materials that we would have to get ourselves.  Though, that made me a bit worried because why are they so cheap when everyone else is quoting me like $10k?

Now I've got all this research into doing a bunch of home renovations.  I've been watching how-to videos on everything from landscape retaining wall for flower beds, decking, tiling, laying flooring, landscape pavers, building a vanity for the bathroom (why are they $1,000?) and bunk bed building (really, $2,000 for a bunkbed Wayfair?).  I'm feeling really motivated to do some stuff, and I've got the time, and have many of the tools that I would need.  After refinishing the fireplace last year, I learned that a lot of it is being patient and paying attention to the details.  Take your time and use the right tools and you have a pretty good chance that things will go well.  There is, of course, some skill (I'm not great at getting a nice smooth drywall finish.) and so there are a bunch of things that I feel like I would need to practice on such as staining and finishing woods. But I could work on that and see how it goes.  Right now a lot of the stuff we're looking at doing would be painting, and I've got that down pretty well. 

This may just be a product of being at home so much and wanting to feel productive. 

Corona Hot Takes

I've generally greatly decreased my media consumption over the past few days/weeks since the start of all of this.  I posted a while back on the funny blog that my wife created as a silly way to document life right now about how news and social media were stressing me out and making me a little crazy and anxious because it's such a train wreck.  Generally, I've been doing better with it, and there are some days where I'm pretty cut off from the nonsense of the day.  I don't really miss it much because I already was at a Trump-Exhaustion level of things and this has just made it all the worse.  Every day it seems like some other dumbass is saying something even stupider.  I mean, I don't think I should expect any different, when the entire Republican Party has spent years denying science, calling climate change a hoax, it's only natural that this extends to what's going on now.

All this gives me a bunch of knee jerk reactions when I read stupidity.  For example, the megachurch pastors that insist they should stay open because "real Christians aren't afraid to die" or that "god will protect them" or even general Republicans and Libertarians who are going to go out for "freedom" or to "own the libtards" I can't help but think, "help yourself! If you wanna go die then have at it because you're only taking out morons like you and that's better for everyone."  Of course, I don't want anyone to die, I'd rather everyone stay safe, even these morons.  But, I mean, they're kind of proving natural selection here if they're going to spread it among themselves and hurt themselves and their families.  It's like that preacher from Virginia who called it a hoax and then died from it.  Like, that's terrible, but if he wasn't such a dumbass then maybe he would have taken it seriously and would still be around today. At the same time, now he's gone and not spreading his stupidity and those who did take it seriously are still with us.

However, it seems like there is this mounting narrative that we've been overreacting because now it looks like we're **ONLY** going to have 60,000 deaths.  It's amazing how this went from, "we're at 15 and soo it's going to be zero" to "well it's **ONLY** going to be 60,000 deaths from this thing so that's a win because ***IF WE HAD DONE NOTHING IT WOULD HAVE BEEN 2.2 MILLION DEATHS*** as if that was an option to sit and do nothing!  I mean, federally it's been almost nothing, but thanks to proactive governors we've ended up with some strong measures and it's been helpful.  I hear that and I wonder if it would have taken 2 million deaths for these jerkshits to actually take this seriously because we're at 60,000 deaths (20 times more deaths than 9/11, more deaths than in the Vietnam War which lasted from 1956-1975 and we've only been dealing with this since January) and they're saying this was a media hoax fed by overreactive Democrats. Does the entire world nearly need to burn down before these asshats become reasonable?  Do they all need to drink the Kool-Aid and take the cult down because they all poisoned themselves and are dead now?  I don't get it.   What will it take for these sycophants to come to grips with reality and start acting like reasonable people who can negotiate in good faith instead of undermining facts and spreading misinformation, lies, and whatever it takes to villainize the other side?

I've become worried that we're reaching a situation that it will take something drastic to reframe things and break the current cycle.  Before the Civil War it progressively got worse and impossible to negotiate and find common ground.  It took a war to get things out of that system.  In the years leading up to World War II we had economic stagnation and a rise in totalitarianism and fascism.  It took a world war reset the world and stop the movement toward fascism, and help spawn serious challenges to inequality in the United States on a widespread.  Now we're locked in this system where one side will do whatever to win power, who denies science, attacks experts, promotes xenophobia and is moving toward authoritarianism and fascism and can not be debated with because anything that comes from any source other than their side is "fake new."  I wondered if this would be the thing that helped reset the positions and realize you can't keep shrinking government programs simply because the last guy did it, that you can't attack experts and ignore their advice because it'll lead to death and disaster.  It seems like in this drastic situation it should be enough to make people realize this is nuts. We have 17 million people out of work, new unemployment claims are so far beyond anything that's ever been reported that the chart looks like a border when in fact it's the recent line.  Nothing like this has happened in the lives of many people alive today.  The first thing I can think of similar to the level of sacrifice is rationing during World War II.  This is unprecedented. This should be the wake-up call, and yet public safety is even becoming partisan.  Life and death have become partisan.  Actual government officials have said that old people would be happy to die for the economy.  What the actual fuck?

I don't know.  It's just absurd.  And there is not immunity on the left for this since we've got the Bernie or Bust crowd still out there yelling about the "rigged" primaries because their candidate got fewer votes. That Biden is no better than Trump.  As if we aren't living in a literal pandemic where the country, economy, and lives are on the line.  What is it going to take for people to get a grip with reality and start acting like responsible adults instead of petulant children or autocratic fascists?  Would it take two million deaths? Is that what we need to realize that science, education, and expertise matters? That operating in good faith and negotiation is more important than partisan purity? I don't want to burn everything down, but is that what it's going to take?

This has been my Corona Hot Takes.  Let's get it together, people.

Keeping Active

This is now the fourth week for me staying at home, though the official statewide stay at home order for everyone is now in the third week.  Some graphs this morning for our county have shown a persistent lower rate of increase, though cases are still growing, they just aren't growing as fast, which is good news and proof that staying at home has drastically flattened the curve here in our area, though not yet statewide.  I'm disappointed because for Christmas I got Becky tickets to see the ABT perform Swan Lake at the end of April, and Danny got tickets to see the DSO do a summer blockbuster show in early June.  Both have been canceled and I'm sure those things will happen again at some point, but for right now we don't have them to look forward to.  In other disappointing news, we ordered some tea from a shop online, and we got it but it wasn't as good as I hoped.  It's not bad, but it doesn't have the same flavor that Teavana had. I still don't understand the point of Starbucks spending millions of dollars to buy Teavana only to close them down.  Like... maybe stay in your lane.  Are they really recouping the expenditure through having a few varieties of their tea in Starbucks locations and the grocery store flavors? I doubt it.

As we're now in the 4th week of this thing, I've found that staying active is really important for me and my general mood.  I haven't been scientific about this and tracked it, but I seem to feel more stressed out and grumpy about things on days that I don't do some sort of activity.  Yesterday I ran and felt very productive.  Today I didn't because I felt tired and didn't feel as productive, though my mood was much better at the end of the day after I did some yoga.  I generally felt more relaxed and less anxious over the last few hours of the day after doing it.  As I said, nothing scientific here, just some anecdotal evidence.  The good news is that I'm getting quite a variety of activities, this week I've done indoor walks and runs, as well as yoga.  Last week I did indoor walks and runs, as well as some outdoor walks, and some time on the trampoline with Sal.  By the way, can we talk about the workout that you get on a trampoline?  My heart rate is similar to when I run, and my legs really can feel it while we're jumping around.  It's no wonder that I had weird legs and was like a rail because we were always on the trampoline when I was a teenager.  It was a lot of fun.

The good news is that this increase in activity is showing a new downward curve on my weight, and in my morning runs I've really decreased the time for me to run a mile (which is now below 10 minutes).  So, gotta stay active out there!

Life In Quarantine

It's been 13 days since the order to stay home came out, and it's been 25 days since schools have closed.  So basically, with the exception of going to the grocery store or the quick drive to the post office or to drop something off to family members who should not go outside, I've been home for the past 25 days.  That being said, it's really not bothering me much to have to stay home.  I like staying home for the most part.  I like having nice slow start mornings. I like being able to work on things around the house and to be able to spend plenty of time with Sal, and all her crazy games (this morning we played pet store where she was a dog that I bought, but then went missing, and I had to put up missing pet signs so that she could pretend to be a person who found the missing dog, which was also her). Basically, I easily could be a hermit in a cabin on a mountain cut off from society.  That being said, I prefer to do my job at school and I don't love doing the online school thing.

I think the thing that really surprised me was how fast this all unfolded.  At the beginning of our last week in school, a coworker said to me that they thought the school would be closed by the following week, and I thought that was unlikely.  It didn't seem like it would be this big of a deal, I mean we had SARS, MERS, and were bringing people in during the Ebola crisis in Africa. I guess I forgot about the sheer incompetence of the current administration.  This is this bad because our fool of a president didn't take it seriously, and still 25 days into this crisis is making wild conspiracy theory style claims about drugs, and wanting to open this soon, and saying that the cure can't be worse than the disease (as if mass death is not worse than a recession).  However, just today in our county we are seeing a drastic drop in new cases, surely thanks to the decisions of our governor to take this seriously even though the president did not (and has made nasty remarks about her because she has pushed back on his poor handling of the situation). It's absurd that this president has made responding to a pandemic a partisan issue with still a number of Republican-run states operating as if nothing is going on while Democratic states quickly responded to the issue and took measures that were necessary for this situation. I guess this is what happens when you spend decades being the party of stupid that goes against science, experts, and knowledge.

One thing that I've appreciated at this time is to start doing some projects around the house that we've needed to get done.  We started refinishing Jasmine's old room so that Sal can move into it.  We're nearly completed with it, we just need to do a little more painting and seal up around the boards so that it has a finished look to it.  The problem is that we don't have enough caulk to complete the job because it took a lot more than I expected it would, and I was overestimating.  We also need a could of longer finishing nails to take care of the baseboard.  The problem is, it's not really a good idea to go out there and get those kinds of things.  It's not necessary, and even though Lowes is open, it wouldn't be right to go out there and pick up unnecessary things. I mean, right before the stay at home order we did a purchase online for pick up, and people were just shopping like it was a normal day.  I hear that's still going on now, but. we haven't really gone anywhere so I wouldn't know.

During these past few weeks, we have also done a number of online grocery orders for pick up and delivery.  This is more expensive, but it seems like this is the better way to avoid things spreading but also bringing down the number of shoppers out there in the stores. I mean, a shopper had to go out to Costco so that didn't really decrease anything, but for Kroger, it just is an employee who is already out there shopping for things.  I figure this also helps keep the lines from getting too clogged and people can get in and out faster.  I'm not sure if this is better or worse since it puts people who probably make less in danger while I can safely stay home.  Though for our shoppers who delivered I gave a sizable tip to hopefully make it worth for them to be out there doing this job. It's a weird time and it seems like there are no good answers for how we should act.

So, that's kind of a recap of the quarantine so far.  It's a crazy situation and it seemed like it's something that I should log because it's definitely history.  I joked with my principal the last day we were at the school that I looked forward to someday teaching about this period in history. Hopefully, people take this seriously and things can get back to normal.  Hopefully, this is also teaching people that it's important for us to spend money on things like the CDC and pandemic identification systems and programs because this president closed them down and has proposed cutting the CDC budget every year including literally RIGHT NOW in the middle of a pandemic. For decades one party in this country has pushed the idea of "drowning the government in a teaspoon" and that the free market can solve all problems.  Well, it seems that is not the case as this thing has spiraled for a few months now and we're looking at possibly 100,000-200,000 deaths as a result of these horrible policies.

I guess we can only do our individual bests to try and look out for everyone.

Goals Update: April Edition

This has been a crazy March. So, here's the recap.

Goal Number One - Read 12 books: This year the goal is set at 12 books, with an extended goal of 18 books.  For January I finished two books up, which was a pretty good start to things. In February I didn't finish any books but I did start two.  In March I again did not complete any books.

Reading List (total so far 2)

1. Dear America: Notes of an Undocumented Citizen by Jose Antonio Vargas
2. Falling Over Sideways by Jordan Sonnenblick

Goal Number Two - Average a one pound per week weight loss by the end of the year: I've not lost any weight, but I have started to become more active.  I've been consistently moving in February, which was good progress. But here's what I got on the mini-goals:

• Subgoal 1: Close my three rings 75% of the time.  March was another perfect month!
• Subgoal 2: Create a schedule that includes two different activities a week.  This month I had two or more activities every week. In the case of March, it was all walks and runs, both indoors and outside.
• Subgoal 3: Log every meal, every day right after the meal.  Don't skip any snacks.  I logged every day, and I did so timely so that was good.
• Subgoal 4: Complete another 5k race. I wanted to do the Walk and Wag 5k in May, but it looks like that won't be happening. I did get an e-mail from the pumpkin 5k from last year, maybe I'll do that again.
• Subgoal 5: Limit my snacking to under 350 calories a day.  This was better under control this month.  It wasn't at my goal, but it was improved.  Small progress I think!

Goal Number Three - Use a social calendar:  So, so far so good! Or at least it was going well until we got hit with this virus.  Obviously, we have not had any social engagements since the middle of March, the last one being the final Family dinner we had on the 15th.  We have done some video conferences with some friends and did two virtual game nights So that's been fun.

Goal Number Four - Home Repair/Improvements:  Since we've had nothing to do we started refinishing Sal's new room.  She's moving into a larger room but wants it to look like her current room, so we have to put up the board and batten look to it.  We've got most of it up but just need to do the finishing of it.  We also had the wind rip off the top gutter, so we need to get that fixed, but the fascia boards in a few places are rotted, so we need those replaced too.  I'm also really wanting to get a deck added.

Goal Number Five - Spend at least one hour a week on creative things: Well I didn't do an hour a week, but I did do two hours one week because Sal and I did art one day during the first week of being at home.

Goal Number Six - Take three photos a day:  I've been doing this on my daily Instagram.

Goal Number Seven - Have seven new experiences:  So, I think we're going to count two because I have never had to live through a pandemic with a shelter in place order. Then there are all the things that come with that, which include reworking my classes to be taught online, ordering groceries, fearing germs when having to actually go into the grocery store.  It's a crazy world!

1. Visited the natural history museum at the University of Michigan
2. Living in a pandemic with a stay at home order, possibly until June

So, that's the crazy month of March! Ick.s

Stupid Ads

I thought I'd take this time to break from the talk of everpresent pandemic and instead rage against another virus upon the internet, advertisements.

So, remember back in the 1900s when the internet was new and most people paid by the minute? Well back then some guy invented the pop-up ad.  I recently heard a podcast discussing the guy who invented them, and in fact, they were designed to circumvent this problem and then kind of took on a life of its own and before you know it, poof! Pop up hell.  Well, at some point people decided that this was dumb and stupid and the pop-up disappeared.  Well, sort up.

Picture it, 2020, you're hunkered down in your house, you're going to some new site to get information about what the situation is with this pandemic, what the big orange monkey in the White House is doing about it. How your candidate is doing in the polls.  You are trying to scroll down to read the headlines, but suddenly the entire page shifts down as a giant fuckoff ad slides from the top.  You try to scroll further down and another ad expands its way into your view.  You basically end up with a screen full of ads that leaves you with maybe two or three inches of the screen of reading space. WHAT THE FUCKBALLS!  And then when you try to scroll you end up triggering them again and you're in this hell of shifting webspace.

Or, you click on an article only to find it's one of those slide show bullshit fuckwad pissshit slideshows, where you have to reload ads every time you advance the slide so that more ads are viewed and they make more money.  IT'S ALL CLICKBAIT!  Or, just as bad its this terribly long scrolling page and every few inches there's a new ad, but as you scroll the new ad has to load and it shifts the page all around and you quickly lose your space AND THE WORLD IS TERRIBLE.

I think I'd rather have the pop-up ads.

Everyone's A Little Bit Socialist

HOLD THE PHONE.

Did Andrew Yang die and his spirit possess conservative politicians? Suddenly today there are all these politicians who are calling for basically cash payments to Americans.  Of course, you've got Little Lindsey Graham out there all aflutter with how he doesn't want the big bad government giving people money so they can deal with this unprecedented crisis.  However, you've got big-name Republicans all the way up to the White House calling for payments to individuals so they can cover things while they can't work and while the economy takes a giant shit.

Here's the thing, this is a great idea, the reason we never do anything like this is that you've got these mega-corporations that pressure legislators into doing things that directly help them, and these things indirectly help lots of different people and places.  They want to ensure they get the cash, which is why the big banks and companies that need bailouts are the ones that get them.  When you give cash to people they use it for what they need, and that may be a little bit all over the place.  You can't control what they spend it on.  However, isn't that the Republican idea, that people can make the best decisions for themselves?  Isn't that "the market" which is always right and what they are always going on about. It's kind of like how they talk about democracy but don't' actually believe in it because they want to make sure they win and they keep their power.

The economy is going over a cliff here, and it can either be a little dip or a big fuck off terrible situation.  You want to make sure it's just a dip, then you need to put money in people's hands.  This whole thing runs off of spending, and the people who spend are not the rich or corporations.  We have seen that time and again.  You give tax cuts and they pump it back into themselves, horde it, or buy another boat.  We've been hoodwinked enough, and the big financial meltdown of 2008 is still fresh in everyone's minds and we all remember how the banks were too big to fail, but you and your family can fuck right off and be homeless, unemployed, and perhaps lectured for not thinking ahead.  We can't stand for that nonsense anymore. They just injected 1.5 Trillion dollars into the banks.  A better use would be to take that money and wipe out nearly all of the 1.7 trillion dollars in student loans.  Remember when they said we didn't have the money for that?  Well, you know what would help the economy? If I had an extra $1000 a month that wasn't going to student loans because you know what I'd do with that money? I'd spend it on home improvements, vacations, going out to dinner, maybe getting a new car.  That money would be pumped into the economy.  Others would use it to buy houses, weddings, and all the other things that would get pumped into the economy.

We've been fed the same line of bullshit of supply-side economics for nearly a generation, it's time that we throw that shit overboard.  The middle class has been ignored over long enough, and I say fuck the cruise lines.  They fly under the flags of other nations to avoid paying U.S. taxes and following U.S. regulations.  Fuck the airlines who charge us for the audacity of bringing a bag with us, or wanting to have a seat assigned to us before we arrive at the gate. Fuck the banks go charge us 29% interest on our credit cards, but give us 0.1% interest on our savings accounts.  It's time we try doing this in a different way.  Conservatives want to say it's all about the market, well give us the cash and we'll see what the market decides.  And remember, that thing you're doing now is what you were blustering on about being socialism a week ago. It's almost like you're full of shit.

Socially Distanced

Still, bars are full, beaches are packed, and people are going about their business like this is all a big vacation.  Well, at least until 3pm today because the governor has ordered all restaurants and such closed to dine in.  That's right, take out only! To those of the rational sort, this kind of thing makes sense and it's great that our governor is taking immediate action because in about 30 days this will benefit us by not overwhelming our health system. Did you know the two major hospitals in our area only have a combined total of 1,500 beds? Many of them full already filled with people with other illnesses.  We don't have a high capacity and if around 15% of people need to be hospitalized, we need to make sure that not many people get this thing.  Rational moves of leaders thinking ahead.

However, if you are a wackadoo on the internet (is that redundant?), then this is some sort of conspiracy in order to take our freedom! This sounds over the top, but this is nonsense I have seen people post on Facebook.  Libertarians up in arms about being told by the "nanny state" what to do.  Yes, Trent, it is your right to get Covid if you want! How dare the government! Well, that's because the government doesn't give a shit about you individually and your right to get sick if you want to get sick.  The government cares about the systems that we have in place and their capacity and is taking steps to avoid a scenario where we don't have enough and doctors are making the choice who lives and who dies, including your dumb libertarian ass. On the other hand, we've got the Fox News crowd that spent over a month listening to The Dipshit In Chief go on about how this is a liberal hoax, and where some hosts called it the "Corona Impeachment" attempt.  These fools are out there ready to lick every surface to own the libs.  This is why this thing is going to burn like wildfire, we have half the population knowing this is serious, and the other half so delusional that they are exacerbating the problem.  Perhaps this is a weird form of natural selection?

Well, the recommendations for the past not-quite-a-week have been social distancing.  Stay home, avoid being in contact with other people, don't go out, don't go to sporting events, or movies, or shows, or concerts.  Basically, stay home!  Today we had to go into school to collect our things and then head out before the school locks up and none of us are allowed in.  While we were there another teacher asked me how I was doing with the whole distancing thing, and I was like, "oh no, this is great!"  I am what you might generously call a homebody or what you might not so generously call Ted Kaczynski without the bombs and crazy ideas.  My ideal house is on like 1,000 acres with my nearest neighbor like at minimum a mile away.  Sometimes, I feel like the best thing in the world would be a small house in the woods somewhere that gets like 6 feet of snow so that there is no way to go out.  Though, part of that links my love for silence because one of my favorite things is when it is snowing there is that silence that snow brings.  So staying home is like my dream.  I could probably sit out this entire thing without leaving the house and it would be fine (disclaimer, this does not include walking the dogs, or puttering around my lawn).

Furthermore, I'm an elder millennial (or perhaps an infant Gen-Xer).  We pioneered the internet, we lived the life of being left at home alone, no internet, nowhere to go.  Then, when we got the internet we learned how to socialize online. I'm like a Swiss Army Knife of social distancing.  So, for me, I'm completely content. I've got my online teaching to fill part of my day, I've got a stack of books to read, basically every streaming service available, endless hours of content, podcasts, games, art, video games, projects, and enough that I could stay home every day for a year and still have things on my to-do list.  Now, once it's warm out I may feel a bit different because I do like to travel and get outside when it's nice, but for now, this is fine.

Fear Itself

I feel like these past few days have made me think we need some reminders of Depression/World War II advice.  In his first inaugural address, Franklin Roosevelt reminded the country that they had, "nothing to fear but fear itself." And that is really what we're dealing with over the past few days.  Fear is what compelled people to stock up on toilet paper. Panic is what left shelves bare across the country. It seems odd that it seems like everyone and their cousin had something with "Keep Calm and Carry On" plastered all over it, but then when the time that such a poster would be used everyone decided not to do either of them. While we need to take this seriously, plan ahead, and avoid as distance ourselves, we also need to calm down from the hysterical fear that seems to be as much of a pandemic as the virus.

I feel like that's the most frightening thing about all of this.  Sure, this virus is potentially deadly, especially to those most vulnerable. Sure I don't want to get it, and it's frightening how fast it's spreading and how inept the leadership has been at preparing for and meeting the challenges we now face.  However, the way people are reacting to this is what really worries me. While this is a serious situation, it is by far not the most serious situation we face. It isn't a pandemic that has a high mortality rate, it isn't a situation that is shutting down our basic systems.  In a few days, stores will be restocked and we will have a more normal shopping experience.  We will not be rationing, we will not have mass shortages, electricity and water will continue. In short, this is a low-level crisis that has been exacerbated because people are hoarding and reacting in a somewhat irrational manner.  It worries me that if this is how they react now, that in the event of a severe emergency that we will not be in a good situation. I'm afraid of how they are reacting and that is causing me to have to think about how I'm reacting and adjust not because I fear I need to for the sake of the situation, but for the sake of how others are reacting to the situation.

This has got me thinking about long term emergency planning, and perhaps coming up with a plan and supplies so that we don't end up in a terrible situation because of how others are reacting.  I suppose the silver lining of this is that it has got me thinking about situations now, instead of realizing this later when things aren't great. 

Two Tier System

Yesterday I wrote about the experience of the mass hysteria shopping experience. It was a bit unsettling the way that people were reacting to the current situation.  I thought that I had picked up everything that we needed, but this morning I realized there were a few items that we still needed.  Knowing that there was nothing at Kroger on account of the empty shelves yesterday, I decided that I was going to take a look at Whole Foods to see if they had what we needed.  I wasn't overly optimistic when I headed over, but I hoped that maybe the few things I needed I'd be able to pick up.  Well, when I arrived it was as if nothing was going on in the world and that it was any other given Saturday.  There were no empty shelves, though a few areas that were clearly more shopped than others. Because they were so well stocked I did the standards shopping that we usually do and got everything that I would normally get on our weekend shopping.

For a bit of comparison, and because I forgot something at Whole Foods I decided to stop the Kroger to see what was going on there and if perhaps it was just a situation that they were able to restock at Whole Foods overnight and that a similar situation would be at Kroger.  Well, as it turns out, no that was not the case.  While there were some restocking and the produce section was looking back to normal almost, the rest of the store was not as restocked.  The meat section was in worse shape from yesterday, the milk and bread sections were at maybe 25% of capacity. It still looked like a store ravished by Black Friday shoppers. There are still people who are going to be going without because they aren't able to restock fast enough.  The hoarding is affecting those who didn't rush out to buy everything under the sun, and now need their regular supplies because they aren't being crazy people.

However, these two stores perfectly highlight the two-tier system we have. For your average person going to the store in the past few days, they can't get milk, they can't get bread, they can't get eggs, they can't get produce.  However, for those people who can afford to pay double the price for free-range, pasture-raised, organic eggs, they will have what they need. I was able to stroll through, pick up eggs, pick up apples and oranges, browse a full stocked meat counter, and not once was there a moment where there wasn't something that I needed that I couldn't get. Yet, perhaps there is also an element of the people who tend to shop at these locations? Is one group less hysterical about this, or started focusing on this earlier and slowly stocked up? Did they realize there was no need to rush out and buy up the entire store right now? Did they instead shift to other stores? None of these questions have answers, but it feels like there are two systems out there.

We Need A George Bailey

In the film, It's A Wonderful Life George Bailey runs Bailey Brothers' Building and Loan.  He's a newlywed who is about to go off on his honeymoon when things go badly and there is a run on the banks.  Everyone storms the Building and Loan demanding to withdraw all their money. This would be disastrous, the Building and Loan would not be able to provide the cash for everyone, it would collapse, and in a world where there is no FDIC insurance, this would mean that some people would lose everything they have put in the Building and Loan.  George tries to calm people down, he convinces them that they shouldn't just take everything, but just what they need to get through for a little while so that there is enough for everyone.  Because George Bailey convinces everyone to be rational, calm down, and think about what they truly need and only take that he's able to make sure everyone is taken care of.

Today I had to run out and grab a few things so that we could make some dinner. I had heard that people were buying a lot of stuff and saw some photos showing lots of empty shelves.  When Sal was at swim class I heard some ladies discussing their husbands standing in long lines at Costco, empty shelves. I was pretty sure that I'd be out of luck when it came to getting what I needed, and when I headed out I was not in the best mood at the thought of having to go out and fight the crowds. Generally speaking, I don't love having to go out and deal with other people, and in this situation, jit sounds like one of the layers of hell to have to go out.  Though, I figured if I got out today I can just get what I need and maybe avoid going out during the weekend since we usually do our shopping on Sundays.

So, I headed out to Costco to see if I could pick up what I needed.  When I got close I almost decided to just forget about it because it seemed like the parking lot was completely filled, but for some reason, there were a number of cars parked out away from the entrance and when I came close to the doors there were plenty of spots available. When I went in I didn't find long lines, and for the most part, there wasn't any trouble getting the supplies I needed.  I mean they were out of Lysol, which I'm annoyed that I forgot to pick up a few weeks ago on our last visit and now we are completely out.  I noticed that they were out of toilet paper, but we have plenty so I didn't need any.  It did seem like things were shopped down lower than usual, where things were full to capacity, but that people had purchased a lot but nothing seemed to be sold out. After I picked up everything I needed I was happy to see the lines were no longer than your average Saturday, or really any day that I go in a Costco.  However, this was mid-afternoon on a Friday, so it seems like it should have been a bit less crowded.

Since things were looking good, I then headed to the local Kroger to pick up some standard grocery things and that was when it was clear that people have lost their goddamn minds.  I have never seen a store so empty.  It was as if everyone was a contestant on Supermarket Sweep and they were just tiring to get as many things into their cart as possible. The produce section was virtually empty.  The meat, while not completely empty was low, and the meat counter was closed and empty.  There was no bread of any kind, no milk, no eggs, no rice.  The canned foods section was virtually empty, and what was left looked liked someone had fought over what was left and these were the discarded remains as the shoppers were pulled apart by security or police. There were cans without wrappers laying sideways on empty shelves.  Boxes that once held cans tossed to the side with some remaining cans forgotten and buried underneath. It was like something you'd see in a movie when a massive comet is about to hit the Earth and nothing is left in the store.  I've never seen anything like it. For the most part, I was able to get everything I needed, we weren't looking for canned foods, milk, or eggs.  We weren't searching for prepackaged foods like Rice-A-Roni or freezer bag meals.  I was not doomsday shopping, I just needed a few things, and fortunately, I was able to get what I needed because I wasn't looking to fill a cart so I could sit in my basement during the apocalypse.

All this got me thinking about George Bailey.  I get it, people are afraid.  The problem is, fear can't be trusted.  This is a serious situation, there is a dangerous pandemic that we're all dealing with, and it's not going to be great, our lives are going to be abnormal for a while, it's hard.  However, what people are doing today, the way they are shopping, it's like that run on the bank.  They're afraid so they want to just take everything.  We need a George Bailey to remind us to calm down for a minute, to realize that we just need to take things down a few notches and take only what we truly need.  We have a responsibility to each other as well. We are a community, a state, a nation, and we all need to get through this.  Stockpiling all at once means that we run out.  It means some people can't get what they need because someone else took more than they needed. Panic is the true enemy here. We need to take this seriously, we need to do the right things to make sure we're doing our part to stop this thing from spreading to keep people safe.  However, we can't panic.  It's clear that our food system and even the way we live our lives may not be working right.  However, this is what it will look like in our healthcare system if we don't do the right things too.  It will be overwhelmed and because people didn't do what they needed to, someone else down the line won't have what they need when they need it.

We need a George Bailey to remind us what we should be doing, unfortunately, we have  Henry F. Potter in the White House.

Over The Edge And Down

Without a doubt, the response that has been coming from the government over the pandemic has been completely bungled. The president has made it clear that he has no interest in anyone being tested because all he cares about is his approval rating and how it relates to his reelection efforts. As a result, while we don't have many cases, it's surely spreading like wildfire without us knowing for sure where.  The response has put people in danger and is certainly making things worse.

As a teacher, I know that I'm exposed to a lot of germs and illnesses.  I feel like I luck out a little bit because I have older kids and they at least can be reasoned with and have enough self-awareness that they don't want to get sick so they take precautions. Though my building is K-8, and I'm sure the little people do not share that same understanding of illness, and fear of getting sick the same way. I mean, my own daughter is constantly putting her hands and things in her mouth. Likewise, I'm sure the kids in my school are similarly challenged when it comes to being hygienic.

Earlier this week we found out that a member of our school community had a brief social interaction with someone who later was confirmed to have COVID-19. I had heard a rumor earlier in the day that our sudden end of day meeting maybe because someone had been exposed. As it turned out the rumors were correct, though the situation was very low risk as it was short social interaction.  That being said, it is a little worrisome that I am suddenly on the front lines. Later that night we got word that we'd close for the day and do a deep and thorough cleaning, out of an abundance of caution.

However, after getting home things started to move pretty quickly.  Shortly after it was announced that the entire state of Ohio was closing every school.  Then, schools in Washtenaw county made the announcement that they were also going to close.  It seemed like other schools in the area were poised to follow suit, however then the Governor decided that to help slow the spread that she was closing all K-12 schools in the state until April 7th.  I know this was not the plan for our school, so there's been a lot of uncertainty about what this means, what we need to do and what's happening next, other than we know we won't be teaching students for the next 3 weeks.  It also falls during our scheduled spring break, so will we be returning the week we had planned on being on break?  Will we actually be off till the 13th.  Is this the plan anyway when the governor decided this, that we'd cut three weeks and get a bonus fourth week because of spring break?  It's all up in the air right now.

What I can say is that I feel this may have just saved some lives.  The key here is to slow the spread down so that we don't have a spike that makes it impossible for us to keep up with the needs of so many sick people at the same time.  If we can slow it and not have to treat so many people then we won't go beyond our capacity.  I think this was the right move, and I"m glad that since that happened there are many other places doing the same thing.  Since yesterday there are now 16 states that have done the same.  Ultimately, I'm not concerned that I'm going to get it, or that it's going to kill me. However, I don't want to spread it to those around me who are not in the best health as it could be far more dire for them.  While the response on a national level has been infuriating and incompetent I'm glad to see states taking the steps to try and contain this.  At the same time, it's also highlighting the huge holes in our ability to respond to these sorts of emergencies.  While this is serious, imagine if this were some sort of far more deadly disease.

So, now I'm home for quite some time. Washing my hands, and being glad I have nowhere I need to be.  It's a bit mind-blowing how this moved so quickly this week. I've never seen anything like this.